My fitness journey: avoiding the potholes of self-doubt
I was in the studio in the gym not long ago, and I’d just finished a particularly challenging HIIT workout (High Intensity Interval Training). As I was returning equipment to its proper place, in walks a woman. I immediately recognized her, our paths cross on a regular, so I said hello. She asked me if I was finished with the jump rope dangling from my hand. I said yes. She asked if I wouldn’t mind leaving it. I obliged and left the studio.
I headed to the other side of the gym to work on my arms. On my way to the dumbbell rack, I stopped at the battle ropes for a thirty-second round, just to prove to myself that I could manage without stopping. I could, and I did. It looks so easy on social media. It isn’t.
Video courtesy of my trainer: MassifFitness
I returned to the studio to cool down and stretch, and the woman was still there. She’d started her own HIIT workout. As I was lying on the floor, twisting and contorting to relieve my chronic soreness and low-grade pain, I could hear her shoes hitting the floor with a successive rhythm. I conveniently repositioned myself so I could see what she was doing without staring. She was completing plank pike hops. Silently. She was sweating, and red in the face, but the only noise emanating from her was the sound of her shoes tapping the floor in sequence; one, two, three, one, two, three.
And I thought to myself, man she’s good at those. Next, she popped up off the floor and started jumping rope. After that, she took a turn on a spin bike. She was working in thirty-second intervals, I think, with no rest in between. As I finished stretching, I could feel the envy growing inside of me. She made it look so easy. If that were me I’d be grunting, mouth breathing, and gasping for air by the second set, maybe the third if it was a good day.
And then I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I stared right into my own eyes, and I said to myself, in my head of course, because I didn’t want this chick to think I was crazy: STOP IT. YOU ARE YOUR ONLY COMPETITION.
I flashed back to the moment I decided to embark on this life long journey, three years ago this month, and I immediately thought about how far I’d come.
I had to remind myself that this is my journey and mine alone.
I cannot compare myself to others, because we’re all on a different journey.
But when I compare myself to me, I see progress. I see success. And, I’m inspired to keep going. I may not be able to do what this woman was doing with as much style, grace, and elegance, but I can do it. More importantly, I couldn’t have done it three years ago. So this posting is a reminder to myself of where I’ve been and where I’m headed. I’ve come a long way on my journey, and it isn’t over yet. In fact, it’s continuous, on-going, and never-ending. It’s not going to be easy, I’m going to stumble, and even take a step or two backwards sometimes. But I’ll never stop. And the goal isn’t to come out the other side looking like someone else’s idea of “fit,” or someone’s airbrushed version of perfection, it’s to always strive for progress, no matter how small or slow.
Be you, do you, never quit, and never allow those seeds of doubt to take root,
Angela